jeff and i went to see a concert at the ram's head in annapolis last night. the show was two opening acts and one headliner but we really only went to see the first opening act, teddy geiger. jeff heard him on this new show on cbs, love monkey, and he wanted to see him.
so we went. we had a few drinks and ate some apps and listened to this kid play (and, truly, he's a kid. he's 17.). he was good. i like his sound, i like his voice. i think his songwriting is a little trite but he hasn't really had enough life experience to write about much, you know?
but here's the thing. this kid is 17. and he's playing a concert on a wednesday night. so clearly he isn't in school. i started thinking about his parents and wondering if they supported what he was doing or if they thought he was throwing his life away and railed on him about finishing school (if he hasn't already. i have no idea.). and i started thinking about the kind of parent i want to be. i want to encourage my kids' dreams even if they seem far fetched and out of reach. who am i to say? i want my kids to dream and believe that they really can do anything.
i think back to my childhood. my parents are great, really. but i had two brothers. and my parents were young when they got married (21) and started having kids (at age 22). so i understand now, as an adult and as a parent, why i wasn't allowed to play travel soccer (too much time and money). and why i wasn't allowed to do gymnastics (my mom worried about eating disorders and body image issues down the road). but i still wonder what if? i was a good soccer player. not the best, but good. my junior year in high school, i had a travel soccer coach ask me to try out for his team. my parents wouldn't let me. i understand that now, but i hope that jeff and i have the resources (time, money and energy) to let our kids try whatever they want to try.
but most of all, i hope that as my kids get older i learn to look at what could be instead of focusing on all the reasons something can't happen (which has always been my nature). because whoever did great things by focusing on their limitations and all the reasons they can't achieve their dreams?
Thursday, February 09, 2006
what i'm thinking about
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3 comments:
It's hard to focus on the dream! As mom's we tend to want to shield them, don't we! Mine are getting older and I am trying extra hard to keep them in extra curricular things. I have a budding cellist who also likes art and a nature-loving daughter that wants to work in the rainforest. I'm getting anxiety just thinking about them going to an out of state college some day. *From you posts you sound like a fabulous mom!!!
Our lives are much more focused on helping cultivate our children than our parents' lives were. You will see what they want, align it with what they need and make it happen. I also think it's important to make sure our kids have kid-time - unscheduled - to learn to amuse themselves and make their own fun, be comfortable with themselves, etc....
Wish we had known you were going to see Teddy Geiger - we really like him! But, I played killer poker last night so it's okay! (I won over $8 - now I can get that operation I've been saving for!)
jodie: thanks for the kinds words. fabulous might be a stretch. :) i'll settle for a competent mom. lol
wendy: i totally agree with you about unstructered play time for kids. my mom was really insistent about that and i think it's so important for kids to learn to entertain themselves. some of my fondest childhood memories are from playing in my room or the woods by myself (perhaps that's why i'm a bit of a loner?) :)
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