jack's new haircut

kate had ballet this morning so i took jack to get a haircut. i've been trying to grow his hair longer thinking it would be easier to manage. he has very thick, wavy hair that grows really fast. i figured he'd have really cute surfer hair - kind of shaggy and messy on purpose. but instead his hair is a mess and while i realize that he's only 2 years old, i also don't want him looking like a slob.

so i took him to one of those walk in places where kid's haircuts are only $9. i was going to just get it trimmed but saw a photo of a kid on the wall (one of those really big photos that those places have of smiling models with haircuts you know some high priced salon in nyc cut). but i asked the girl to try to give him a haircut like the boy in the photo. i wasn't holding out much hope but figured a) it's hair and it grows and b) he's 2. he doesn't have to have cool hair yet.

well the girl suprised me because i love jack's hair. it's not a little boy bowl cut - it's a real boy haircut and now my little guy looks so much older. she even put gel in his hair to get it spike up like the photo. it's adorable if i do say so myself.
no bias, of course.

note to self

if you buy bags of halloween candy the week before halloween AND it happens to be the week before your period, you will have to buy more candy before the trick or treaters come knocking.

NAOCP

i posted about this new organization over on my photo blog. if you know of any organizations or families who could use this, please email me. it's completely free of charge.

more kids

are you sick of photos of my kids, yet? these are from yesterday, at the playground by the new house.

musings

i've been busy lately...busier than i have been in a very long time. not that staying home with two kids isn't crazy, but this is different. now i have deadlines and other people to answer to and client expectations to meet and it's taking some getting used to. for the past 2 years, i've been my own boss. my clients were an infant and a toddler and they had no idea if i didn't give them a bath or forgot to add carrots to their lunch. nap time was whenever i said it was and it could be a different time every day. i could do what i wanted and no one was the wiser.

but now it's different. i'm volunteering, building a house and my photography is really getting busy and all of a sudden i feel like i'm disappointing people. my mind is in 8 different places and no one is getting the benefit of my full attention. i have friends who run their own businesses, volunteer WAY more than i do and are on so many boards it makes me dizzy. and yet they still find time to take their kids to baseball games and help them with homework and play poker with friends. i don't know how they do it.

i wonder if it's possible to have a type A personality without the drive? you know, to be uptight and tense and want things perfect but not have the drive to make it happen?

i dunno. maybe i'm type W. you know, whatever.

progress

do you know what these are photos of? they're photos of work being done on our new house! finally! we signed the contract two and a half months ago and they started digging the foundation today.



































they tell us we'll still probably hit our original move-in date of march, barring any bad weather this winter. we'll see. at this point, i don't even care. they've STARTED. that's enough for me.

(and in case you're wondering, yes, the houses are close together. they're supposed to be that way; it's a traditional neighborhood development.)

overheard

tonight, as jeff called the kids downstairs for the dinner he had prepared:

jeff: kate! jack! come downstairs for dinner

(two pairs of little feet running down the stairs)

kate: what's for dinner, daddy?

jeff: salmon, rice and edamame

kate: AWWWWWWWWW! i don't WANT that. i want KID food!

throw your arms around me

i can't stop listening to this song this morning:

hunters and collectors cover of a neil finn song

i found it on one of my favorite blogs. this woman has great taste in music and i've come across a few of my new favorites bands through her.

can't stop listening. yum.

a thousand words

the pictures say it better than i can. here's what our weekend looked like:

girls night out blog

i've never seen so many photos of me with my mouth open that wide. we were *those* girls at the restuarant and bars. you know the loud, drunk, obnoxious people that everyone else in the place is looking at and feeling sorry for/annoyed by? yep. that was us.

but we had a blast. an absolute blast.

(the skinny guy with the beard who looks slightly jerry seinfeld'ish? that's my little brother. it was as good seeing him as it was hanging with the girls.)

last night

OUCH.

wendy and i are hurting this morning. seriously hurting. having that much fun should not hurt this bad.

surprise

i drove to ohio with a friend today (we're meeting other friends tomorrow). because we had tonight free, we decided to stop in to see my parents (who live in ohio). i called my dad to let him know we were coming by and that i wanted to surprise mom. we arranged to meet at the house at about the same time.

my friend and i pulled up to the house (dad wasn't there yet) and hopped out. i ran up to the door and rang the bell and my mom opened the door.

and then stood there and stared at me. without saying a word.

(if you know my mother, you know that has never happened before. her not talking, that is.)

she was stunned. and then she hugged me and we laughed and i explained why i was there.

it was wonderful.

thanks for dinner, mom! i got you!

kitty kat and jack jack

praise the lord and pass the beans

got an email today that our house permits are good to go and we can schedule our pre-construction meeting.

whoo hoo!

our house is really going to start being built. and all it took was me getting fed up and calling the permit department myself :)

divinely inspired

last night i broke down and ordered a pizza. i'm not supposed to be eating pizza on my low-glycemic eating plan, but i was craving it and jeff wasn't home and there was no one to stop me.

turns out, i was meant to order that pizza. apparently Christ himself managed my pizza experience. and hey, who am i to argue with Christ?


(click the image to see it larger)

i needed a laugh

jeff and i hit a wall today with the new house - it's been two months since we signed the contract and they still haven't officially broken ground (they've dug some more dirt for the foundation, but that's it). the official word from the builder is that we're waiting for the county to issue the permits. it doesn't take two months to get permits for a house in a development that's already been approved. we're the last single family house in our part of the neighborhood and it's getting disheartening to see all the other houses completed and people moving in.

so today i was mad and frustrated and pissed at no one and everyone. so i decided to take photos of the kids which is what i do to let off steam.

i got this one of jack in his pajamas playing with his new winter hat. it made me laugh which i needed to put things into perspective.

what do you do with a cup?

kate had her 4 year check up at the dr. today. she had to read the eye chart and pee in a cup and have her ears examined. after all that, i had to fill out some paperwork that measures where your child is developmentally. the questionaire asks the kids to draw circles, to identify colors and animals and also has the parent ask the child questions. here's how our question and answer session went down:

me: kate, what do you do with a pencil?

kate: draw with it!

me: what do you do with a banana?

kate: eat it!

me: what do you do with a cup?

kate: pee in it!

random thoughts

* talked to a pregnant friend last night who is due in two weeks. she was asking me about going into labor and if she'd know it (she had read my post on kate's birthday about how i didn't know, with either of my kids, that i was in labor). she was nervous and excited and ready but not ready and it reminded me that just 4 years ago i was in the same position: pregnant with my first baby and not knowing what to expect. i remembered what it was like to be on the other side of the fence - of not having any kids yet but being so close. and i was excited for her, knowing what awaited her on the other side once she has her baby. knowing that she was going to cross over into a completely different world that she has no idea exists right now. i can't wait to welcome her to the other side. it's a great place to be.

* the non-profit i'm involved with collected donations of toiletries last night for a local women's shelter and i offered to drop the items off. the kids are home today and i'm debating dropping the items off today and taking them with me or waiting until they are in school tomorrow to do it. my problem is i'm not sure how to explain to kate what the shelter is. i want my kids to know that not everyone lives the same life they and their friends do, but is 4 years old too young? i'm worried that we'll get to the shelter and kate will ask me a question (in front of someone, i'm sure) that i won't know how to answer without a) being too complicated for her to understand or b) simplifying it so much that it comes across as patronizing. i should just take them with me and deal with it as it comes up, right? why do i worry about these things? how do explain homeless women and children to a 4 year old?

* i went to a dinner last night and decided it was a 'special occasion' so i had some bread AND a large piece of chocolate cake (neither of which i'm supposed to eat on my low-glycemic eating plan). my stomach was up in arms last night and i STILL feel sick this morning. ugh.

* i love fall. it's my favorite season of the year.

today

it's a gorgeous day outside: no humidity, light breeze and leaves that are just turning yellow and starting to litter the lawns. the windows are open and the shades are slapping back and forth against the sills and best of all, the kids are down for naps. i'm having a brief taste of peace right now.

it's a beautiful day.

birthday photos

i posted photos from kate's birthday dinner on my other site.

(AND: i ran into a friend this morning at the coffee shop and she asked me if i'd lost weight. it's working! it's working!) :)

just thinking

i was in the coffee shop this morning with the kids (i love the coffee shop by our new house. they have a small play area for kids so i can actually drink coffee and read without having to entertain the kids).

anyway. this morning. the newspaper. i was skimming an article about wealth and poverty in our country and how so many people can't afford health care. i really don't remember what the article was really about, but it got me thinking anyway: why aren't there 'adopt a family' programs? i mean, you can adopt a child in a third world nation and provide money for their health care and schooling, but we don't have things like that in our own country.

this is particularly meaningful to me right now because we're building a new house. i picked out my new kitchen yesterday and was super excited all day about it. i love my new kitchen (and i don't even cook!). but since the day we put our deposit down on the house, jeff and i have struggled with what it means to buy this house. how can we buy this house when so many other people have so little? we vacillate between that and thinking that we've worked hard and we deserve to enjoy our success.

i volunteer for a non-profit and i'm proud of what i do, but it doesn't feel like enough. i want something more personal...more hands on...more tangible. the newspaper article got me thinking that i'd like to be able to adopt a family - to help them buy their medications and groceries and clothes for their kids. to help with the electrical bill or an unexpected hospital bill or car repair. jeff and i are lucky enough to be in a position to help and yet i feel like i don't know how. i know there's an answer somewhere, i just don't know what it is. i'd love to have some sort of online system that could match families. you could adopt a family and see their 'wish list' (sort of like amazon) but instead of books and CDs, it would be their day-to-day necessities. i don't know how to do it. but it's a thought.

i'm going to keep thinking about it.

happy birthday, kitty kat

today is kate's 4th birthday. four years ago, right now, i was at my midwife's office hooked up to a fetal monitor. i'd gone in for an ultrasound because kate was measuring small (we realized later that she had stopped growing). after the ultrasound, i happened to mention to the doctor that i'd been having frequent braxton hicks contractions all day. she noted that i was only 36.5 weeks along and agreed that it was probably nothing, but just in case, she hooked me up to the fetal monitor.

turns out i was in labor. 4 cm dialated and 75% effaced. didn't even know it. you know how they always say when you're in labor you'll know it? not true. i didn't know either time with my kids.

so four years ago today, i was hooked up to the fetal monitor. jeff watched the contractions on the paper and said several times that it looked like i was in labor. i told him he was wrong. he was right.

i went to my in-laws house around 3pm (they live right around the corner from the hospital and we lived 30 minutes away) to wait out some more contractions. around 6pm they started getting heavy so i headed to the hospital. got hooked up with my epidural and at 11:52pm, anna kate goldscher came screaming her head off into the world. all 4 pounds, 14 ounces and 17 inches of her.

and now she's 4. and i'm finding 4 to be a difficult age (i'll take a 2-year-old any day). but she's still my kitty kat. and i love her. and i can't believe she's 4.

haiku

red and yellow leaves
the trees are turning colors
fall is almost here

thursday thirteen

Thirteen Things I Bought at the Mall Today 1. a really cool pair of puma sneakers 2. a pair of jeans for kate 3. a size 4T fleece jacket that doesn't fit either of the kids right now, but was so cheap i bought it to put away for next winter 4. two hair clips 5. a hair band 6. a cheap, fake pearl necklace to wear for fun 7. a black jersey wrap dress that i want to wear every day because it feels like wearing sweats but looks dressed up 8, 9, 10. two chicken nugget happy meals and a grilled chicken salad at chik-fil-a 11. a decaf, fat free, sugar free vanilla latte 12. a sweatshirt for kate 13. a long green scoop neck tshirt that covers my muffin top Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. finding blanche 2. tessa's blog

'twas the night before...

the kids start school tomorrow. i've been dreaming of this day for the past 4 years. i've held onto it during the 2am feedings, the nights of nebulizer treatments, the ear infections, the temper tantrums, the willful disobedience and the long car trips.

and now it's almost here. it feels like christmas eve - the anticipation of tomorrow is going to make it hard to sleep tonight.

the only kicker is that the first week back to school is a warm up: they only go for an hour tomorrow, an hour on wednesday and and two hours on friday. NEXT week they go to school for real. but even that can't dampen my joy.

tomorrow morning i will get my kids dressed, put their backpacks on and drive them to school. i have stay there for that hour so it's not freedom yet, but it's the start. it's close. i can taste it.

sleep study

i have to go in for a sleep study tonight. a few weeks ago when i went to see my doctor about my high cholesterol, she asked me some general health questions. somewhere in the conversation she hit upon the fact that i'm always tired and as she started asking me more questions (and i kept answering yes, yes, yes), she told me she wanted me to go in for a sleep study. she thinks i might have PLMS - period leg movement syndrome. you know, one of those fake diseases that drug companies invent so that they can sell medicine to cure it? yep, that.

so i have to head into baltimore tonight at 9pm (NINE pm?? i'm usually in bed by 8:30). i get to sleep in a 'hotel-like suite' with monitors taped to my head and body and legs and then i get to leave by 6am tomorrow morning. the worst part is that i can't take a nap today. i'm so tired and all i want to do is lie down on the couch while the kids are napping but i can't.

i haven't been nervous since i scheduled it two weeks ago but today, as the time gets closer to actually having to do it, i'm getting butterflies in my stomach. i know they're not going to find anything wrong with me...i've always been a sleeper and have always been tired. my whole life. it's just the way i'm wired.

sigh.

sweet!

i met some of the women who are going to be my new neighbors! i had to drop off a check today at the builder's office and decided since it was a nice afternoon, i'd take the kids to the playground. we've been to the playground before, but usually in the morning and we've always been the only ones there.

but today.

oh, today.

i drove up to the playground and there were 5 or 6 moms with tons of little kids running around. i was a) glad to see so many little kids and b) nervous about being the new mom on the block and figured no one would talk to me.

enter marty.

she came right up to me and introduced herself and asked if i lived in the neighborhood. i told her we were building our house and were moving in the spring. she laughed and said she did the same thing when she was building her house - she'd come to the playground with her kids hoping to meet other moms.

so she introduced me to the other moms and it turns out that one of them will live on on our street (she moves in next month) and will live two houses away from us AND her son goes to the same preschool as kate and jack (carpoool!). marty was so, so nice. her son is a month younger than kate and she actually had on a tshirt that i have - it says 'i'm too sexy for my minivan.' how could i not like her?? plus, she loves all the same junky reality tv shows i love :)

so it was wonderful. met some moms, kate and jack met some other little kids and i am more excited than before (if that's possible) to move into the new neighborhood. my in-laws moved into their neighborhood 30 years ago when it was first built and some of their best friends to this day are friends they met when the all moved into the neighborhood. everyone was new, so everyone went out of their way to meet each other.

i think that's what maple lawn is going to be like.
i hope!

thursday thirteen

Thirteen Things I Wish I could Eat Today 1. eggs 2. bread 3. milk 4. pepperidge farm milano cookies 5. cheese 6. ketchup 7. mayonnaise 8. pizza 9. onion rings 10. a milkshake 11. ben and jerry's mint chocolate cookie ice cream 12. sushi 13. crystal light fruit punch Links to other Thursday Thirteens! 1. (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

Get the Thursday Thirteen code here!


The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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welcome, dan

my little brother started a blog this week. it's amusing because he's a techno-phobe. doesn't like computers, or techy gadgets and doesn't care that apple is coming out with downloadable movies next week. my older brother, my dad and i are all computer/tech geeks in one form or another. i guess dan figured when my mom (a former techno-phobe who has, in the past few years, come around quite nicely) knew more about computers and internet emoticons than he did that it was time for him to jump in.

so now i have a blog, my older brother has a blog and my little brother has a blog. it's nice because we live in three different states (MD, NC and OH) and don't get to see each other that often. it's a cool way to keep up on the ordinary details of each other's lives...the stuff that doesn't make it into phone calls. i like knowing what my niece and nephew did over labor day weekend and being able to see dan's new-to-him truck.

now if i could just get my mom to start a blog...

funny shirt

saw my friend, wendy, at the gym yesterday morning.

she had on a tank top that read 'schvitz'.

it made me laugh. got to find me one of those.

detox sucks

this week, week one of the 'dare to lose' plan, is called detox.

i hate it.

i had to go to the grocery store last night to pick up baby wipes. it's never a good idea to go the grocery store when you're hungry, never mind when you're forced to eat only vegetables for a week. i walked slowly down the ice cream aisle looking longingly at my old friends, ben and jerry. i made my way over to the deli to fondle my favorite cheeses (hello muenster! looking good, provolone).

sigh.

the woman who runs the program said that after day three, it won't be as hard. day three is tomorrow. she'd better be right. i'm ready to gnaw my arm off.

dare to lose

i signed up for this weight loss program at the gym called 'dare to lose'. it's about learning to make better choices in food and exercise. i figured since my doctor told me to lose 20 lbs that i'd give it a shot. it starts on tuesday and i just got the shopping list for the first week from the instructor. apparently the first week is a 'detox' week; the good news is that there is a list of foods that i can eat the first week - and i can eat as much of them as i want. the bad news is these are the foods:

alfalfa, artichokes, argula, asparagus, bean sprouts, beets, bell pepper, bok choy, broccoli, brussel sprouts, cabbage, carrots, cauliflower, celebery, collard greens, cucumber, eggplant, green beans, hot peppers, jimcama, kale, leeks, lettuce, okra, olives, onions, parsley, radishes, sauerkraut, snow peas, spinach, tomato juice, tomato paste (only 2 tbps!), tomato sauce, water chestnuts, watercress, yellow squash and zucchini.

seriously? i'm supposed to eat that for a week? there is another list of fruits i'm allowed to have (but only 3 servings per day) and also a list of sample menus. want to read one of them?

pre-breakfast
lemon juice in warm water

breakfast
canteloupe
herbal tea

snack
banana
detox or herbal tea

lunch
vegetable juice
veggie burger
cucumber salad
carrot sticks
apple
detox or herbal tea

snack
green beans
detox or herbal tea

dinner
vegetable soup
mixed greens salad with mushrooms, asparagus, tomato and beets
strawberry and blueberry medley
herbal tea

snack
fresh cucumber, red and yellow peppers
detox or herbal tea

i have way too many comments to post them all here, but let me just say: pre-breakfast? riiiiiight. green beens are not a snack unless they are accompanied by a bowl of ice cream. strawberry and blueberry medley? if there isn't any whipped cream then it's just some fruit in a bowl.

what have i gotten myself into?
if you know me and see me around town the next week and a half, you probably don't want to talk to me because i think i'm going to be super cranky.

i didn't do it. i swear.

(he took a tumble at the playground yesterday)

funny man

a little background for today's story:

we're having new carpet installed in the bedrooms today. we had to clear out all the kids toys and all our junk and we stashed it all in every nook and cranny we could, including the bathrooms. we have dresser drawers in our tub and all kinds of junk in the kids' bathroom tub.

so. kate's preschool has been out since mid-june and they don't start again for two more weeks. i've had a little too much kid time and i'm at the end of my rope. at the risk of sounding like an awful mom, i'm sick and tired of being with my kids 24/7.

as jeff was leaving for work this morning, i told him that today might be the day he got a phone call at work telling him i'd drowned the kids in the bathtub.

he looked at me for a minute and said, "you can't do it today because the tubs are all filled. i'll worry about it tomorrow."

funny man. funny man.

and the award goes to...

if there were an award for the mother who could scream the loudest and most often at her children, i would win it. hands down. no contest.

stay-at-home-dad

jeff watched the kids all day today. i had a photo shoot this morning, came home and proofed the photos for 3 hours and am leaving in 10 minutes for another photo shoot.

he was just wrangling them into the car to take them over to his parent's house for dinner when he turned to me and said, "i don't know how you do this. i'd shoot myself."

sometimes it's the simplest things that make me happy :)

k and j

today:




























my mom called this morning because it's been ages sinces we last talked. at one point, kate wanted to talk to her. i gave kate the phone and the first thing she says is 'i don't have any clean underwear today, nan'.

thanks, kate. rat me out, why don't you?

i know, i know

it's been a while. we just got back from vacation a few days ago and i'm getting caught up on my life. regular posts are coming :)

one item to note: three weeks from today, BOTH KIDS WILL BE IN PRESCHOOL THREE MORNINGS PER WEEK!!!!!! my life restarts in three weeks.

sigh.

bliss.

at the beach

took this one of jeff and jack this morning:

20 pounds

my doctor told me yesterday that i need to lose 20 pounds.

twenty. pounds.

that's a lot. i'm only 5'2".

it bugged me all day. i've never been told by anyone that i needed to lose weight. ever. i've always been the small, athletic girl who could eat whatever i wanted and not gain any weight. i've always been active. i only gained 20 pounds when i was pregnant with kate (and lost it all and then some after she was born) and i only gained 17 pounds with jack. i've been working out with a trainer for 2 years. i'm strong. but apparently overweight as well.

sheesh.

the doctor asked me to tell her about my diet and i was really proud - i started ticking off all the nutritious, organic foods i eat and proudly told her that i stopped eating meat about 3 months ago.

she cut me off halfway through my list and asked me, "so where are all the vegetable?"

um.....vegetables?

riiiiiiiiight.

sort of forgot about that.

apparently i'm eating way too much dairy and protein and not enough vegetables.

sigh. so i'm off to the grocery store to buy some carrots and celery and any other rabbit food i think i can stand to eat.

those pounds better melt off me.

thursday thirteen

Thirteen Things about today 1. a clean, groomed dog is a joy to behold 2. i get to start picking out new house selections in two weeks 3. we're leaving for the beach on saturday and i haven't begun to pack 4. going to the beach with five other families could be a disaster 5. i have a dr. appointment today to discuss my high cholesterol 6. kate got herself dressed this morning by herself 7. jack did not 8. i'm wearing one of my favorite shirts today. across my boobs it reads 'girls against gravity' 9. i drank a large cup of caffeinated coffee this morning (which i don't usually do) and i'm totally jittery 10. the kids start preschool in 4 weeks and 4 days 11. i have to finish a photography project for a client before we leave for the beach. it's going to be a tight squeeze. 12. all the fall clothes are in the stores and it pisses me off. summer isn't over yet. 13. i can't wait for fall so i can wear jeans (and won't have to shave my legs every day) and closed toe shoes (so i don't have to polish my toes all the time) Links to other Thursday Thirteens! (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

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The purpose of the meme is to get to know everyone who participates a little bit better every Thursday. Visiting fellow Thirteeners is encouraged! If you participate, leave the link to your Thirteen in others comments. It’s easy, and fun! Be sure to update your Thirteen with links that are left for you, as well! I will link to everyone who participates and leaves a link to their 13 things. Trackbacks, pings, comment links accepted!

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plumber butt

so i dropped my diamond ring down the bathroom sink last night. total accident - i was giving the kids a bath and realized i was still wearing my ring. without even thinking, i took it off and tossed it over to the sink, forgetting that my sink doesn't have a stopper thingy in it (i have no idea where it went).

the ring hit nothing but net on the way down.

gulp.

i called down to jeff and told him what happened. he promptly called his brother - who can fix anything and everything and whom we probably owe thousands of dollars for all the help he's given us - and asked him what to do. dave walked him through it and jeff told me what to do.

then jeff left to go sit shiva for a distant relative.

so i got out the wrench, turned off the water, unscrewed the sink trap and voila! dumped my ring and all the gooky water into a plastic bin. i put everything back together, tested for leaks and put my ring in my jewelry drawer.

i might have to get some low hanging pants and let my crack start showing.

happy things

1. a humidity free day with a light breeze

2. two new pairs of shoes

3. sitting on the porch while jack yells at the koi pond "where nemo go? where nemo go?"

4. catching up on emails and phone calls from the last week (EM - i'm going to email you a new date! promise!)

5. leaving the dog at the groomer so she'll come home today with a (clean) clipped coat and shorter toenails

6. not having anything to do until i pick kate up at camp at 1pm

7. looking through my new ann sacks tile catalog, drooling over all the tile i want for the new house but can't afford and will never get

yesterday

yesterday was august 7 - two years to the day that we brought jack home from the hospital. he was in the nicu for 37 days. 5 weeks and 2 days. the longest 5 weeks our mine and jeff's lives combined.

O's vs. Yanks

jeff and i went to the orioles v. yankees game last night with some friends of ours who are visiting DC this month. we had great seats - directly behind home plate, about 20 rows back. we were in the shade for the entire game and the oppressive heat of the past few days had broken. all of that would have been enough, but we beat the yankees 5-0 and they only had one hit all game.

stick that in your pipe, yankee fans.

they've started!

we drove by the new lot tonight because i hadn't seen it in a few days and i was itching to see if they'd gotten started. they have! they've started (just barely) digging out the basement; there were a few big piles of dirt. that's all. just a few big piles of dirt, but it's something. SOMETHING.

the wait for the new house is as slow and painful for me as the wait when i was pregnant. i want something to happen NOW. right now, not months from now (my dad jokes that's the reason both my kids were premature). :)

i can't wait to see more big piles of dirt.

so nice

my sister-in-law brought her kids over this morning so our kids could all play. we were going to try to meet at the pool but i had to stay home to wait for the AC repair man (just missing one little part - the AC is working) and a pick-up service to pick up some IKEA stuff we bought but that doesn't fit the space.

so tessa brought the kids over and the kids played in the basement and in kate's room. we ordered pizza for lunch and tessa and i got to sit around and shoot the shit. it was so nice. i love that our kids are old enough to play together without needing us.

thursday thirteen

Thirteen Things about today 1. i love my in-laws like they were my own parents 2. i am very lucky to have air conditioning on a regular basis. some people live without it. 3. you can go through the mcdonalds drive-thru with you and your kid in pajamas and the man at the window will pretend not to notice. 4. dogs do not like to be hot 5. workout clothes absorb sweat even when you're not working out 6. kids are more resilient than their parents 7. don't order coffee on a 100 degree day when you have no air conditioning 8. the effect of a cold shower lasts for about 30 minutes 9. frosty refrigeration is a funny name for an HVAC company 10. i'm glad we'll have two HVAC systems in our new house 11. jeff's office has air conditioning and no children 12. i understand why there are more violent crimes in the summer 13. i am thankful that i have a cool(er) basement to hang out in today and am not homeless on the streets. Links to other Thursday Thirteens! (leave your link in comments, I’ll add you here!)

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perfect timing

maryland is breaking all kinds of records for high temperatures the past week or so. it was 100 degrees today (depending on where you got your info; i saw everything from 98 to 103). the kids are hot, the dog is hot, jeff is shvitzing like there's no tomorrow and every other phrase out of my mouth is 'it's HOT'.

to top it all off, our air conditioning just died.

no, really, it did. the house is about 80 degrees and not cooling down. jeff went to look at the unit in the basement and discovered that our carpet was soaking wet and that the unit wasn't running at all.

AT.
ALL.

jeff's brother is coming over to see if he can help (he's a handyman savant) and his parents said we could pack up the kids and the dog and sleep at their incredibly cool house tonight.

it's hot. jeff is in a pissy mood and i am going to have to go wake up two sweaty sleeping kids and take them to my in-laws.

good times.

254

my doctor called me today with the results of my bloodwork. i thought for sure she was going to tell me that my thryoid is out of whack and that's why i'm packing on the pounds and feeling like crap lately.

nope.

she called to tell me that my cholesterol is 254.

TWO HUNDRED AND FIFTY-FOUR.

anything over 200 is considered high. optimal range is around 150'ish (i think).

i'm so pissed. i stopped eating meat, started eating whole grains and have been working out with a trainer 2x per week. i could have been eating ice cream and pizza for every meal while lying on the couch watching jerry springer and my cholesterol would be the same.

our new street

that's our new address come March 2007. our new house will be on the corner of ellington and early morning; we were hoping (praying) our address would be ellington because our front door faces it, but no luck. it's better than our current street name (liquid laughter lane. really, it is.) but we still think early morning sounds goofy. especially since the other streets are liberty and harrison and midtown and chesapeake and normal sounding names like that.

in any case, the paperwork is signed and we are the proud owners of a big pit of mud. we found out that we don't get to pick the colors of the outside of our house; we didn't even think to ask that when we were looking at the neighborhood. but apparently the homeowner's association decides what colors houses go where. i guess it's a good thing so you don't have three yellow houses in a row, but it was still a bit of a surprise. i was planning on a white house with black shutters but it turns out we're getting a yellow house with green shutters and white trim. it's very pretty but i just never pictured myself as a yellow house kind of girl.

here's a picture of what our house will look like: (the white one on the left)
















but it will be in these colors:















we're super excited about the house. we have so many things we have to decide - cabinets and countertops and carpet and wood floors and trims and hardware, but it's thrilling. we remodeled our current kitchen last spring and although it pains me to have put that much work into it just to sell it a year later, i also get to apply lessons learned to the new kitchen. i feel so lucky and giddy and happy and i just want to jump up and down and yell '[our new address!], [our new address!]'

*edited on 8-8-06. husband did not want our new address out in cyberspace.

more alike than we think

i got a cool email today from someone who read my blog for the first time today (hi TL!). she and another woman have girls kate's age and we're trying to coordinate a party for the three of them since their birthdays are within a few days of each other.

anyway, this woman said she read my entire blog and mentioned a lot of the ways that we're alike. and it occured to me that we're all probably a lot more alike than we realize. but because no one talks about being insecure or not wanting to entertain their kids all the time or about buying new clothes instead of doing laundry, we assume no one else feels that way. and we feel isolated and lonely.

it doesn't need to be that way. i wish we weren't all so afraid to admit what we think are weaknesses but are, in truth, really just human nature.

lot 214

on friday, this sign will say 'sold'

:)

ewwwwwwww

me: kate, what would you like for a snack?

kate: ummmmmmm

me: would you like some matzo?

kate: yes!

me: would you like peanut butter on it?

kate: yes. peanut butter and cream cheese.


where did she come up with that? thankfully we didn't have any cream cheese so she's eating peanut butter and butter on matzo. still ick, but not quite as bad.

enough is enough?

if you've read my blog for any amount of time, you know i struggle with wanting more and wanting to need less. as we're getting started on building the new house (we're talking to our mortgage broker today to get the wheels in motion. it's really happening. we're building a new house.), it's getting more acute.

i love the new house. it is a fantastic floor plan for our family and has lots of features we wish we had in our current house. this is a house we can live in until the kids go to college (and beyond, really). but we don't NEED the house. our current house is perfectly fine. sure, it's not our dream house, but what right do we have to make all our dreams come true when so many other people in our country (and the world!) have so little?

is it selfish to buy something you don't need just because you can? is there a difference between buying a shirt you don't need and say, a car? a house? a luxury vacation? buying this house won't stop us from giving to charities and donating our time and efforts to causes we believe in, so is it ok? (i'm asking that rhetorically. i know i'm the only one who can figure out the answer.) if we didn't buy this house, we could give more. but is that what we need to do?

i'm a fairly black and white person: things are right or wrong. good or bad. easy or hard. it's hard for me to live in the grey areas in between; i struggle with it. and not just when it comes to money issues. i was very religous in college and i struggled with my faith - was i enough of a believer? was i doing the things i should do? was i going to church enough? was i donating enough money and time?

it's always a question of enough. i don't know if i'll ever find the balance. have you? how? (ok, that totally sounds like something mike meyers would say on SNL: "discuss amongst yourselves")

yikes

our realtor is calling to put a hold on a lot in a new neighborhood going up not too far from us. this might really be happening. we might really be moving.

yikes.

scary but exhilarating.

thanks!

for all the ideas about what to name my photo galleries on my new website. i decided to chuck the idea of different galleries and just have one big gallery. much easier.

for a sneak peak of my new site, check out my comps on the designer's website.

gratitude

i borrowed a friend's 'oprah's 20th anniversary' DVD collection over the weekend and have been watching it. last night while i was skimming through it, i hit a segment where oprah talks about her gratitude journal. she writes down at least 5 things every days that she is grateful for - and they have to be things that happened that day.

i thought it sounded like a nice idea and something i could certainly use right now as i throw daily temper tantrums about building our dream house and seem to be having a hard time focusing on the things i *do* have instead of all the things i don't. i decided last night to start it today and to post it on my blog so i had more incentive to do it.

it was not to be.

this morning after dropping kate off at preschool, i backed into a parked car in the parking lot. hello?? my car has a back-up camera in it. when i put my car in reverse, there is a camera on my dashboard to show me what's behind me and i STILL managed to nail the other minivan. the woman was very gracious and kind and it turns out it's just paint damage (so i guess there's something to be grateful for afterall!).

then i met my friend at the mall. she needed to return some bras to nordstrom and decided to get fitted for the correct size so she could buy the right bra. i decided to get fitted, too, since it has been a year since i was last measured and my bras had become a little, ahem, snug lately.

turns out i've gone up two cup sizes in a year. TWO. CUP. SIZES. i now wear a size 34-ginormous. it just reinforced the fact that i've put on weight lately, despite the fact that i am eating better and working out more. how is this possible? (i'm blaming it on a thryroid condition. my dad has one and he has been after me for years to get mine tested. my obgyn gave me some paperwork to get some annual bloodwork done and she included checking my thyroid on it. i don't know if i'm hoping i DO have a thyroid condition or not.)

so tomorrow, then. tomorrow i'll start my online gratitude journal. hold me to it.

help me out

the designer who is doing my new photography website emailed me the comps today and i adore the site. but i need to come up with gallery names. currently we have 'babies', 'children' and 'families'. i don't necessarily want the galleries that limiting, so i'm trying to think of other names (like 'little ones', 'bigger ones', 'everyone' - or something like that).

any creative folks reading this who want to give me a hand? anyone sitting at work, bored out their minds (EM!), and want to take a stab at it?

dream house = dream

i'm going out with our friend/realtor on friday to look around town. she cautioned us about the difficulties of buying property in howard county - not just the price tag, but the fact that alot of the good lots (even single lots) are already owned by builders and they are tied in to building your house.

so our dream house isn't out of range just yet but it's slipping further and further away. i have to keep reminding myself that we HAVE a house and we are lucky to live where we live and if we don't get to build our dream house, we'll be fine. we're in our early 30's for chrissakes. we have time. jeff and i are so damn impatient :)

casidy chandler

one of my best friends, meredith, had her first child last night - a little girl named casidy. meredith had to have an emergency c-section because the cord was wrapped around casidy's neck but everyone is doing fine.

welcome baby casidy!

cold turkey

we're going cold turkey with jack and his pacifiers. we hadn't planned on it, but jeff was moaning about having to go on the nightly paci search (we have about 18 pacifiers and we can never find them at 2am in the morning). i decided that tonight was the night. period. no more pacifiers. kate was 2 years old when we took her pacifiers away so i guess the timing is right.

he's upstairs screaming and sweaty and frustrated. all he's screaming is 'paci! my paci! paci! my paci!' i feel awful but i also feel like it's time.

bad mom. no donut.

pee wee's playhouse

it's back for the summer on cartoon network. i'm tivo'ing all the episodes and the kids are watching it as i type this. i forgot how much i love this show.

the summer between my freshman and sophomore year in high school, i was a nanny for two little boys down the street. they loved it and we watched it over and over (and over) again that summer. i used to be able to sing the theme song by heart and i knew all the characters. watching it again, almost 20 years later (yikes) is like watching it for the first time again. i forgot about cowboy curtis and conky and randy. i love this show.

the word of the day is little.

sadness

today i found out that a friend of mine lost a very, very close friend of hers. actually, i found out about it a few days ago in a round about way but mistakenly thought it was someone else who died (a distant relative of mine and a friend of the family of hers.)

anyway, i didn't call her or worry about her because the person who (i thought) had died was old and it was a natural end to a long life. but still, i sent her a card to tell her i was thinking of her.

she called me today to thank me for the card and when i mentioned the name of the person i thought she was upset about, it turns out it wasn't that person at all. she lost a very close friend - so close that he was really more like family. i actually met him and his wife a few months ago at my friend's house and i liked both of them very, very much. and when my friend told me it was *him* who had died, i gasped. i was stunned and i was sad for my friend. and i was sad that i hadn't picked up the phone a few days ago to see how she was doing.

i'm sad for my friend. i know she's hurting and i wish i could help in some way.

baring it all

(no, not that way. get your mind out of the gutter.)

when i was in north carolina visiting my friends last week, one of them asked me why i keep a blog. she said she'd read it a few times (she's not really *into* computers and email. it boggles my mind. but i digress) and she didn't understand why i'd want to write about personal things. she was referring, specifically, to this post. she said she always thought of me as a private person and it was strange to her that i would write about things i wouldn't talk about in person.

i had to think. it was a good question and i wasn't sure i had the answer. but i told her that writing on a blog is fairly anonymous, even if people you know are reading it because you can't see them. i don't see your (whoever you are reading this right now) face when you read one of my posts and think it's biased or dumb or pointless. you can choose to comment or not. if you choose not to comment, then i don't know you even read it. and if you really hate my point of view, you just don't have to read it. so i figure that anyone reading this is either interested in what i have to say or thinks it's so god-awful that they have to read it to see what i come up with next (sort of like a bad car accident. you don't want to look, but you do).

but why do i blog? i dunno. it's complicated. partly it's because i'm a stay-at-home mom with two young kids and it's nice to have something to do. it makes me feel like my journalism degree isn't completely wasted :) but i think that mostly it's because for my entire life, i've always felt like everyone else has everything figured out. i've always felt like the odd duck who worried about *everything* and felt insecure and unsure. it's only as i've gotten older that i've realized that LOTS of people feel that way but don't or won't admit it. and that's fine. but i'm getting comfortable with being unsure and of not knowing the rules. and writing about it helps me to feel more comfortable with it because i hear from other people who feel the same way.

i suppose blogging, for all its anonymity is a way to feel connected to people. a way to know that i'm not alone in my insecurity. a way to know that it's ok to be the way i am.

playdate etiquette

kate has a playdate this morning with a little girl from her class. i don't know her mom really well - just in that chatting-in-the-halls-when-we-drop-off-and-pick-up sort of way. but she's a very nice woman and kate adores her little girl. so the mom invited kate over for a playdate this morning and kate is so excited. but me? i'm a little confused. i'm not sure if i'm supposed to drop kate off and come back to pick her up or if jack and i are supposed to hang out at her house while the girls play.

yes, i know i could just ask. but i feel stupid for not knowing. i feel like either way is an imposition: either i'm asking to dump my kid off at her house while i run errands or i'm asking to hang out at her house when she could be doing things she needs to do.

i'm totally clueless. there are few things i like less than feeling clueless and not knowing the rules.

**UPDATE: i talked to the mom and told her i felt dumb but i wasn't sure what i was supposed to do. she was so nice and said she had just planned on me dropping off kate. phew. over and done with. (but i still feel dumb) :)

we belong.

kate had her first day of summer camp today. she went to the same camp last summer (and it's held at the preschool she goes to during the school year). i remember the first day of camp last year - neither kate nor i knew any of the other kids or moms and we mostly stuck to ourselves.

what a difference a year makes. this morning kate saw all of her friends from her class and there were hugs and little girl screeching all around. i got to talk to some other moms (and met a new one). it was so different and so nice. we belonged.

my boys

flat pak house

have you seen this? jeff and i both gravitate towards modern, west coast style architecture (which makes living in the land of cookie cutter houses kind of hard). i found this site/product a while ago and tucked it away. jeff and i have been talking about moving but we weren't sure where or why. we don't need a bigger house, but we want a different house. we could update and continue to make changes to our current house but it will never be the house we dream about. jeff wants a home office and i want a house filled with natural light and open spaces. i want concrete floors, european cabinetry and industrial fixtures. and i don't want to have to worry about resale (we could never make these changes in our current house. it'd never sell again).

i hope we can do this someday.

and...

...this is why we call him chuckles:

then and now

this photo is of me and my three best friends, circa 1992 (the beginning of our sophomore year in college):

















and this is a photo taken yesterday:
















i never thought we'd be friends long enough to introduce our kids to each other. it's one of those things that makes getting older worth every wrinkle and extra fat roll.

northern virginia sucks ass

i used to think that hell would be having to go to the gym and do endless seated leg raises. i know now that hell will, in fact, be having to live in northern virginia and navigate the traffic tie ups.

i detest northern virginia. i loathe northern virginia. i wish we could just get a giant eraser and wipe it off the map.

photos of katie

i posted some photos of aylin's daughter on my other site.

old friends

i'm writing this from an embassy suites hotel in cary, nc. i drove down with the kids today to see my three best girlfriends. one of them, aylin, lives in japan, but flew home last week because her dad had a heart attack (he's doing well). since aylin only comes to the states once or twice per year, we all decided to meet up. meredith lives in cary and jenn lives in charlotte so we all met here in cary (which is where i grew up but has changed *so* much since i lived here. holy moly.).

anyway. jenn comes into town tomorrow so tonight the rest of us went out to dinner. me, jack, kate, aylin, her daughter katie, and mere and her husband, chris. aylin's daughter is coming up on 10 months old and mere is due with her first child on sunday (i know. crazy, right? we're all hoping she goes into labor and has the baby before we all head home.).

we all met our freshman year in college, almost 15 years ago (holy shit. 15 years??). we've all been friends ever since. we've all been in each other's weddings and now we're all having kids. jenn just had her first child (a little boy - tommy) in april, so as soon as mere pops out her little girl, we'll all be moms. and it's weird. it's chaos seeing each other now because it's loud and there are kids all over the place. but it's wonderful. i can't believe we've gone from giggling, boy crazy freshman on the 6th floor of coltrane dorm to wives and mothers.

i love it.

thank you

to the good samaritan on great star drive today. you saw my daughter and i standing in the scorching sun, on the side of the road, clearly lost or left behind or in some kind of distress. you lent me your cell phone so i could call my husband and tell him where to pick us up after the parade.

so many cars passed us in the 45 minutes we stood on the side of the road and you were the only one who stopped. something as simple as lending me your cell phone has me tearing up as i type this.

thank you whoever you are.

beach photos

the album is posted here.

i have the bug...

...to move. every two or three years i get antsy and need a change of scenery. that worked well when i was younger and single but as a married mom of two? not so much.

we have good friends who live in northampton, ma and we visit them every fall. every year, jeff and i wax poetic about the life we would lead if we lived in northampton. they have funky coffee shops, electic shops and not a gap or banana republic for miles around. it's a community of artists and aging hippies and wacked out college students from nearby smith college. being different is not just encouraged, it's expected. Art, with a capital A, is first and foremost and women who wear jeans and fleece jackets and don't wear makeup are the norm.

i feel like northampton is so much more me than columbia, md. columbia is a wonderful community with fantastic schools and a staggering number of activities for kids and families. but artistic? quirky? nope and nope. everyone drives the same three or four cars (including me) and all the houses are variations of the same floor plan (including mine). we all wear the same clothes, shop at the same stores and have our hair done at the same salons. it's not that i don't like columbia - there are so many things i love about my community (namely that jeff's family lives here and we get to see them all the time). but every now and then i long for more. more funk. more unusual. more earthy and natural.

and the thing is, i know that moving to northampton wouldn't cure my wanderlust. i would love it for two or three years and then i would start to miss access to good shopping and restaurants, new houses with up to date plumbing and electrical systems and people who are a little more normal.

sigh.

kate at the salty dog cafe

we had lunch at the salty dog cafe yesterday before we left (instead of coming home as planned today, we left late yesterday afternoon).

salty dog photos

kate's photo is in the second row, at the far right. she was so excited when she saw jake (the salty dog) walking around and wanted her photo taken with him but when he actually tried to hug her and talk to her, she clammed up and clung for dear life to jeff.

(jeff and i were talking about dressing up as jake must be THE worst job in the world. i mean, it was 98 degrees in the shade yesterday and we were all sweating in shorts and tank tops. this guy/gal was dressed in a heavy fur dog costume and was walking around the outside cafe. you couldn't pay me enough money to do that job. i'd take a job as a fry cook at mcdonalds; if you're going to have to wear a stupid outfit, at least you get air conditioning at mcdonalds.)

new favorites

i bought two of these tshirts on vacation. i bought 'carpool fuel' (which i'm wearing right now) and 'i'm too sexy for my minivan' (which i will probably only wear at home).

i also bought the cah-UTEST shoes for kate. the best thing about them is that they are slip-ons and they fit kate. kate's feet are so narrow that she has a problem with slip-on shoes (they always slip off).

jack's (early) birthday

we celebrated jack's 2nd birthday last night because we'll be in the car driving back to maryland tomorrow (his real birthday). we all had dinner at the beach club and then ate cake. the highlight was the guitar that uncle dave and aunt tessa got for jack; he has become obsessed with guitars lately. he slept with it last night and hasn't put it down this morning yet. he loves it. some photos from the fesitivities:

a shout out to dan

happy d-day, little brother.

it's been a hell of a year for you. but you've handled it with a strength and a maturity i never knew you had; i'm proud of the man (man?! you?) you've become.

you're not off track - you're taking a different path. everyone's is different and there isn't a right way or a wrong direction; the point is to learn who you are and what you want no matter which way you're going. you're doing that. heck, you've pretty much done it. i know you feel like there is a lot more to discover but you're on your way. the search doesn't end, you just keep refining it.

i'm proud of you. i love you.
your big sister

scenes from an italian restaurant

(actually, scenes from a hilton head playground)

days of the week

you know what one of my favorite things about being on vacation is? forgetting what day it is. i woke up this morning and had to struggle to remember if it was sunday or monday. or thursday or saturday. i had no idea.

i love that.

(i think it's sunday)

boo urns

(obscure simpsons reference)

last night jeff was watching a basketball game. i asked him why there was still basketball on if the heat had already won the championship. then i realized that he might not have watched it and was watching the final on the dvr. oops. thankfully he already knew the heat won but he did ask me, very nicely, to be aware of that in the future so i don't spoil a game for him.

fair enough.

i don't watch sports. i don't root for any teams and don't really care who wins what championships. EXCEPT for the world cup. i've been looking forward to today's usa v. ghana match all week. i recorded it because i knew i'd only get to watch bits and pieces while taking care of the kids. i got to watch the first half when the score was 2-1 (ghana ahead). i planned on watching the second half after the kids went down for a nap. i was really excited - it looked like the usa might pull their heads out of their butts and make a comeback to stay in the world cup.

jeff called me around noon:

me: hello?

jeff: i'm sorry your team lost.

me: (silence)

me: I HAVEN'T WATCHED THE SECOND HALF YET!!!!!

jeff: i'm sorry!

me: when would i have had time to watch 90 minutes of soccer while watching two kids???

jeff: uh, uh, uh....

so boo urns on jeff for ruining the game for me. ironic, isn't it, coming on the heels of our conversation last night? argh.

packing day

it's the most dreaded day of all the days: packing-to-go-on-vacation-for-a-week day.

thankfully, my friend's 11-year-old son is coming over for a couple of hours to play with the kids so i can get stuff done. his mother called me a few days ago to tell me that he had two days without camp activities and to ask if i interested in a mother's helper either day.

um, YES.

the timing couldn't be better. he'll entertain the kids while i do laundry, pack suitcases, and scrounge up sunscreen, swim diapers, juice boxes and DVDs for the 10-hour car trip to hilton head. i'm going to have him come over every packing day from now on :)


(the usa vs. ghana world cup match is on at 10am. i know we're going to get killed and be out of the cup, but i'm hoping against hope for an upset. fingers crossed.)

photos

kate has finally tired of modeling for me. she won't let me take her picture anymore so i apologize for the awful photo posted below of her new earrings.

















this is another poor photo of the kids this weekend; i like the photo only because of what it reminds me of: they wanted to take their naps together at the hotel this past weekend.

















and another (subpar) photo of jack in the tub tonight. it makes me laugh.

dove ice cream

jeff went to the grocery store to buy me a pint of my new favorite ice cream. i dream about this ice cream. i crave it. i NEED it.

all i can think of right now is how to get the kids to bed at 6:00pm so they won't ask for some of it.

summer is over

apparently summer is officially over, at least according to retail stores. i went looking for bathing suits last night (we leave on friday for a week in south carolina) and the little bit that the stores had were all on the sale racks.

um. excuse me? it's june 21. summer hasn't even officially started yet and you're already clearing out the summer clothes to make way for the fall clothes?

judas priest.

i finally found a suit at the bathing suit store in the mall (you know the one that sells suits year round?). i figured i'd pop into target this morning to get a few terry cover ups. there was nothing. nada. zilch.

you know what really bothers me about this? it just reinforces the need to buy, buy, buy in our culture. we stockpile and buy things in bulk so that we don't run out. we're buying bigger houses so we can store more of our stuff. and i'm really trying to stop doing that - to buy what i need when i need it. but it's hard to do that when you can't buy a swimsuit in june and can't buy a winter coat in january.

sigh of relief

we're home. jeff's brother got married yesterday and though it was a beautiful wedding and it was wonderful seeing family we haven't seen in years, it was also exhausting dealing with two small children the entire weekend. we even brought a babysitter with us and i'm still wiped out.

highlights from the weekend:

1. during the ceremony, kate flung her lolipop - by accident! - and hit jeff's brother in the foot during the bedeken which they did during the ceremony so all 250 guests were watching.

2. kate and jack slept in their own beds in an adjoining room for the first time. sniff, sniff. my babies are growing up.

3. after the ceremony we went to take family photos in a park. halfway through the photos, kate told me she had to go to the bathroom. there are no bathrooms in sight. i was in heels and a dress and kate was wearing a poufy silk dress. i scooped her up, kicked off my heels and ran across the park to a huge oak (?) tree. i took her underpants off and taught her to squat. when we were finished, kate said 'mommy! i learned to pee in the trees!'.

4. hanging out with our babysitter, michelle. she is best friends with jeff's cousin, jordie. jordie and michelle have, over the years, become part of our family and my kids adore them both. this morning when jack got up and didn't see michelle in the hotel room, he ran to the other room and came back asking 'where ma-shell go?' he loves her which works out well because kate thinks jordie hung the moon. we're really lucky to have michelle and jordie in our lives.

5. coming home we made the trip from philly to columbia in under 2 hours. record time and i didn't really speed.

pierced ears

kate got her ears pierced last night. my own mom wasn't going to let me get mine pierced until i was 13 but relented when i was 9 because everyone thought i was a boy. i never thought piercing your ears was a big deal so i always said that when kate asked for it, i'd let her.

we've been playing this game for a few months: i ask kate if she wants to get her ears pierced, she grabs her ears with a look of fright on her face and says 'maybe tomorrow'. clearly not ready for it. but last night we met jeff at the mall to run some errands and we passed libby lu. i asked kate if she wanted to get her ears pierced and she said 'ok!'. i wasn't quite prepared - i really thought she'd say 'maybe tomorrow'.

so we went in. we picked out a pair of earrings. she sat in my lap. i told her again and again that if she didn't want to do it, we could leave. she said she wanted to. the woman pierced the first ear and kate let out a blood curdling scream that the entire mall must have heard. my heart sank into my toes and broke when it hit the floor. the woman quickly did the other ear which brought about another scream and i hugged kate to my chest, trying to absorb the pain.

she was fine 5 minutes later - as soon as we told her she could choose where we went for dinner. she chose the cheesecake factory (how is she my daughter??).

i'll post a picture later today.

self important

i had to go to the grocery store at 4pm today which is something i never do and especially not with two whining, tired children. but i needed a few things (milk and diapers - i really did need them). so i went.

as i was coming out with the kids and a full cart (that always happens, doesn't it?), i noticed a car was blocking the crosswalk. i had seen the woman ahead of me, saw her put her groceries in her car and get in. i thought it was was rude that she parked in a crosswalk - ESPECIALLY since she was wearing workout clothes. what? she couldn't walk an extra 5 steps?? - but wanted to give her the benefit of the doubt. maybe she was late to pick up her kids or had to run into the pharmacy to get medicine. something, anything that would give her a reason to be rude and park in a crosswalk.

but no.

as i reached the other side of the crosswalk where her car was sitting, she was sitting in the front seat of her fancy european car, talking on her cell phone. i glared at her as i tried to manuever my cart between her car and the cart barriers and almost couldn't fit. i turned around and gestured wildly (no, no that gesture...just a good old wild waving of the hand to say 'what the HELL are you doing??'). she turned her head and kept talking on her cell phone.

i was so mad. i'm still mad. who does that woman think she is? who ARE these people who think they can do what they want and are above common courtesy? (above LAWS for chrissake - last i checked, it wasn't legal to park your fat ass in a crosswalk). i just don't get it.

sometimes i'm jealous that these people can go through life so easily ignoring what i'm always aware of (standing at the top of the escalator after you get off so that people behind you run into you, walking three abreast on a narrow sidewalk...). it must be nice to feel the world revolves around you and you can do whatever is easiest for you.

argh.

glad to be home

had a great weekend with my parents, but was very glad to come home to my jack jack and kit kat.

heading home

i have a 5:55pm flight home to ohio tonight (i'm not from ohio. my parents moved there when i was in college. everyone asks me that). very excited to see my parents. i've been in a weird funk lately and it will be nice to have my mom baby me this weekend (not that she babies me, but you know. it will be nice to be with MY mom instead of being someone else's mom for a few days).

i'll check in this weekend. or not. i plan on sleeping a lot and getting foot rubs and polarity treatments from my mom.

bliss.

what a feeling

relief, that is.

i had a photo shoot yesterday with a client who is a graphic designer (and a very good one at that). so she knows all about color and composition and has a very refined eye when it comes to anything visual. i was totally nervous about the session but also really excited because i knew she would be up for trying anything. plus, she's art directed wardrobes for television shoots so all three of them had on the perfect clothes (and colors!) for a photo shoot.

i sent her the link to her proofs this morning and bit my nails and paced the floors thinking that she'd get them and think 'eh'.

but she didn't.

she loved them.

and i breathed a huge sigh of relief and moved one step closer to my goal of becoming a photographer.

(photos are here.)

feet

i hate feet. i don't like to touch them, don't like them on my bed or near my pillow or anywhere near me. i think feet are gross.

but.

i love to have my feet rubbed (my mom gives the best foot rub. hands down, no contest. the best.) and i absolutely love to photograph feet.

that's weird, isn't it?

drunk parenting

jeff just called me from his cell phone to tell me he was on his way home (after a long, hectic day at work).

jeff: i'll be home in about 15 minutes

me: hurry. jack is on my last nerve today.

jeff: well, i can't promise you that i won't have some work to do when i get home.

me: so i shouldn't start drinking yet?

jeff: well, you can but you might have to feed the kids drunk.